Yeap I was ( and sometimes still am) that guy. The guy that cant tell that shes interested in him. Wastes time and only realises later after the window has passed. He then tries to do something about it but…alas..shes not interested anymore.
So, over the past couple years I have gradually gotten better at this. I’m going to share with you briefly , How to know if shes interested insted in you.
before I begin, let me establish some parameters. Im not talking about women that you know and have spent significant time with already. Im talking about a girl you have just met and only know eachother briefly. Also, these are from my experiences
Most girls drop subtle hints and cues in your direction if they are interested in you. Some are intentional others are subconcious. This hints are called indicators of interest (IOIs : a PUA term).
Its important that you learn how to tell the difference between genuine IOIs and fake IOIs. Fake IOIs are those IOIs that she throws at you quite early. When a woman starts flirtying with you 3 seconds after you have introduced yourself its normaly fake. e.g being touchy and sex talk. Kinda what strippers do ( …or so im told). Its usually just another means of manipulation ( dont judge, you would do it too if you could. You probably do it right now anyway). I tend to ignore those initial flirty things, as a matter of fact I call her on it.
Ok so, i’m having a good interaction / conversation. I feel that shes into me but im not sure. To be sure I do the following.
I shut up
Somewhere during the hieght of this back and forth of conversation I would just stop talking. Im pretty comfortable with akward silences not many people are.
If she reinitiates the conversation, its normally a good indication that shes interested. Look out if she reinitiates the conversation with a question she has already asked you.
If we are in a group of people, I would just start talking to someone else. Yeah I know, it seems a little rude. But think about it, who wants to be stuck talking to someone they dont want to talk to? here is a gap for her to leave if shes not interested….but if she IS INTERESTED ..well she doesnt have to? get it?
Have an opinion that is the polar opposite to hers
When you are getting to knwo someone usually you exchange infomation about fav music, books, movies etc. If she says she loves THE CURE band say that you dont but you prefer Bryan Ferry’s Roxy Music.
When you like someone you generally try to syncronise interestests. If she says something like “They are ok too.” its a plus.
OK ok…that one was a little odd…Use it with caution. I like it because it works well for me.
Laughs at my cheesy jokes
This one is the bomb! I love cheesy jokes and chirps with subtle hints of sarcasm.
I have noticed that women that are attracted to me normaly laugh at all of them even though I personaly think they only giggle worthy. Its by far the best indicator of interest for me.
Shut up and keep eye contact
This is a variation of the first one. This time shut up and hold eye contact. If she holds it back …well..its ON.
Ill do a little something on eye contact next time.
thats it for now.
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Hmm… some interesting points, and some are spot on. But the more ‘obvious’ signs like flirting and teasing are also good indicators.
If I meet a guy and I’m interested in him, I often give him a bit of kak to see how he reacts. If he plays along, then he’s worth checking out, if not then no worries. Eye contact, smiles, even that old eyelash fluttering, and teasing are a dead giveaway.
Also, you have to be careful with the shutting up and polar opposite interest ones – only try these if you have a hunch she may be into you. Nothing puts me off more than a guy I’ve been talking to an maybe gelling with suddenly ignoring me. 9 times out of 10, I’ll just take that as a signal that HE isn’t interested, and I don’t have the patience to wait and see what his deal is, instead I’ll just give up. Same story with having opposite interests, it doesn’t matter what music you like – but don’t lie just to try and make me agree with you, it won’t work.
the polar interests thing is also quite subtle.
Its a simple example of NLP.
apart from the obvious singnals ” hair play etc ” the ones mentioned hardly fail me.
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